On Her Own

When it’s over (Conversations with The Obscene Sailor – Episode 4)

To wrap up our series, Lee of The Obscene Sailor and I talk about the next step of many relationships: when they’re over. It’s a tough topic fraught with many potential stumbling blocks, but we all know that it happens. More often than we’d like, they’re also filled with potential dangers to heart and body, and we cover many of them and strategies to make these endings part of the fabric of life and not tears that can rip us apart.

It’s not all negative, after all. We highlight the possibility of neutral and even friendly partings, and the steps we can take during and after a relationship to make them happen. Part of it is work that requires the cooperation of our partners and ex-partners – but part of it is under your control too. The parts that you can work on aren’t only helpful to leave less anger behind you, but also so that you can emerge into the next phase of your life healthier than ever before.

But yes, sometimes ending a relationship is full of fighting and tears and yes, sometimes violence, whether from your ex-partner or others. We talk about the signs that could indicate that you may need to take extra precautions when splitting up, and steps that you can take for your physical safety, not to mention aspects of your life like financial security. We also refer you to Sara Westman’s article in Recoil about the practicalities of protective orders.

Join us as Lee confesses one of his bad habits from his divorce, and then let us know if you have any questions or any topics you’d like us to expand on. We’d love to fix Lee’s mic and get together for a reunion episode, and maybe more as we leave this series in our past like our ex-partners.

Hi, I'm Annette.

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